Friday 29 November 2013

Getting Lost in the Spotlight


By now if you inhabit the rock world and don't know of the hideous case of Ian Watkins then your world must actually be one of rock, as you would have had to be very fortunate or have been living under a stone to not have heard that the former Lostprophets singer had pleaded guilty to 13 counts of sex offences this week, including two charges of conspiracy to 'rape a baby'.
Yes. That's right folks, just let that sink in a moment.
If your skin doesn't crawl at the thought you have a stronger constitution that most people.

Last year I signed off by commenting about my personal view on the man, but in the spirit of 'innocent to proven guilty' it would be a very tabloid thing to have made a presumptive leap and put the boot in.
Well now here's my opportunity…
And to be honest I don't have the stomach for it.
Lostprophets and I go way back (not in too close a way) which may come as a surprise to some who read this regularly but it's true.

Back when I was at University I was, even then, a fierce champion of the British Metal scene. I was lucky enough to be regularly going to gigs when the likes of Therapy? Pitchshifter, Raging Speedhorn, Johnny Truant, Jet Pack and Floor (who became Hundred Reasons), Breed 77 (okay they are from Gibraltar), Feeder, One Minute Silence, Sikth, Earthtone9, Murder One, Iron Monkey, Kill II This… I could go on, were high profile and touring a lot. Through Exeter's Cavern club came a virtual cavalcade of decent bands at least once a month where you could go along even if you weren't that into the headliner and be guaranteed of a ass kicking band on the bill.
It was through such endeavours that I got to know Mark Mynett of Kill II This - I didn't know him well to be fair, I'm not claiming we were buds, but he would recognise my face and always make time to catch up. I know plenty of people who will talk smack about him now, but he was always a decent guy to his fans.

So rewind to a gig circa 2000 and Mark is outside on Queens Street unloading K2T gear and naturally we went over and started to chat with him. After a short while he broke off and checked the time, before telling us we had to go and watch the opening act Lost Prophets as they were going to be 'the next big thing'. Curious by this statement we went and checked them out crammed onto the tiny stage and you know what?
They were fucking great.

I appreciate not everyone liked Nu Metal despite the purpose it served at the time, and some people vehemently dislike the idea of turntables in rock etc but that evening the Pontypridd band were on fire, you could feel something special happening around them.
Sure there were moments that weren't stellar - like the singer speaking in an America accent but they really were riding a wave at that point.
We hung out with them after the show; for those who don't know LP actually started as a side project of a couple of the band members who were in a hardcore band called Public Disturbance and fancying myself as a punk/hardcore affection ado at the time I did know a little about the band and enough to talk to them about it.
The majority of them were pretty cool actually - Lee Gaze, Mike Lewis and in particular DJ Jamie Oliver (not the fat tongued lisping Mockney food burner). I could embellish the story saying Watkins was off chasing underage skirt, but the fact was if he did it wasn't noticed. He was just a bit quiet, an aloof cunt if you want the brutal truth, but then he's a singer and we were drunk, sweaty blokes basically trying to fan boy a band so we could stay later and drink more. I would have fucked me off too at that point.



However that is not how the story went and we ended up taking them around Exeter and in particular to KFC, but I bought the Visible Noise version of FakeSoundOfProgress (the version regarded by the band as a demo) and got it signed by all of them.
Next time they came back to the Cavern they had serious critical mass behind them, there was a buzz on the UK scene about them, the place was sold out.Watkins sneered from the stage that night in his irritating faux accent that they 'were going to be the biggest band in the world'.
You could almost believe him at that point.
We chatted again to the same guys from the band we had gotten on well with the time before  - obviously harder to do now and they were excited but still lovely guys and we all left happy campers.

Then for me something seemed to go a little wrong.
Metallica's management group Q Prime stepped in and acquired the band, a sure fire ticket to fame.
They remixed FakeSoundOfProgress to give it a more 'America appeal' and re-released it, destroying the sound of it for me, the shit radio rock version of a moment of lightning captured in a bottle. A simple and effective cover now clogged up with dumb fucking Transformer images (before that was big again) and just a product so far away from what it once was that it seemed like a betrayal to all of us who had shelled out for it in it's rough cut form.
It stripped the band of any homegrown charm - I know the band have struggled to grasp the concept over the years as to why a section of their previously rabid support turned on them in such a vicious way, but at the time it felt like a slap in the face to the people who got them noticed.
You are not good enough as fans, this is the audience we are chasing.
So yeah, fuck you very much good night Lost Prophets - sorry Lostprophets now.

Well not quite, I did catch them on the main stage at Ozzfest in 2002. It was nice in some ways to see the little band get so big - I sang along deliberately and unintentionally out of tune (I was plastered) mocking Watkin's America vocals and trying to spot Faye Tozer to no avail.
After this came the stories of being flown to the States to be wooed by major labels. One particularly story which I am sure is common place, but not often reported is that one label splashed out on over $900 of tattoo work for the singer to get a really gay looking pair of Baz Lurman Romeo & Juliet style pistols on his hips.

After that it was a case of Americanising up the band - Jamie Oliver was moved from turntables to keyboards (as Nu Metal started to fall from favour) and sophomore album Start Something was released.
To be fair to Q Prime their strategy worked and the band's mainstream popularity exploded with the likes of Burn Burn and Last Train Home all over the airways.
Now it really was fuck you and goodnight for me.
You could argue at this point that I was being an elitist scenester and the band who no longer fit in my pocket were now too big and not 'the band I took to KFC' so therefore I turned my back on them.
Maybe there is a touch of smoke on that fire, but frankly I couldn't stand the album I did like once they 'realised their vision for it' and truthfully, hand on heart, the band they became I would rather take a fucking drill to my ear than listen to.
Given the still vitriolic stance of the metal scene towards them (even before this sad turn of events) I can safely say I wasn't alone.
But whatever, the reality is my opinion only really counts to me and the the band had sold to date 3.5 million records and were poised to go on to become global headliners with their next album release, like it or not.

Fast forward to the sad events of this week and the band are in ruins.
Watkins, if the truth be told, has copped to just enough to satisfy the prosecution that they can avoid a long and harrowing trial whose details will not help further condemn those involved or heal the victims. All you can do is hope that it only ever got as far as conspiracy.
Having split up in the months leading up to the trial the remaining band members have acknowledged that they cannot continue with the name as forever the association of Watkins crimes will hang over them.
Indeed it seems true as the Lostprophets have been labelled a 'pedo band' despite the fact that only one member was guilty of these heinous acts, but then this highlights the idiocy prevalent on social media as even lame children's entertainer Ian H Watkins of Steps fame has had to step off twitter as he has faced a barrage of outraged people abusing him for crimes he hasn't committed.
Still its probably the only thing that could get him back in the news…
News broke today that HMV was pulling all of the bands back catalogue from it's shelves in all 140 over priced stores.

George Davison the LP tour manager of 12 years issued the following emotional statement that sums up better than most the emotion involved in the demise of the band.

YOU THINK YOU KNOW SOMEONE BUT YOU REALLY DON’T.
From 2001 – 2012 you trust in a person amongst a group of great people and the day comes when you are shown the true nature of a person.
Its easy to just to brush away and try to forget the last 12 years of knowing Ian.
That’s not going to happen to me or for the others that thought we knew him.
We lived and breathed the same space together intensely for a long time and I would have NEVER predicted that this would have happened.
We rode the wave of success together, all of us coming from humble backgrounds to flying around the world together.
All experiencing the rush of seeing exotic places for the first time, meeting your rock n roll heroes, relentless touring, marriages, births & deaths together.
Its a bond that for some is a fleeting, transient experience. Jumping from one band to another.
For me it wasn’t like that, at least with Lostprophets it was never like that for me.
I will never forget my times with this band. The Good, the Bad and now this the Ugly.
The Ugly truth that Ian let us all down, his family, band mates, friends and fans across the world.
I feel right now so angry, astonished and pissed off with him for what he did.
I feel so sorry for his victims, the children he abused. I only hope those children can grow up without the taint of what he did to them clouding their futures.
I would never attempt to excuse anything he did as I firmly believe he made his choices and now he will pay for them.
Do I feel sorry for the accused woman and Ian?
Right now, I don’t feel sorry for them at all. They were all complicit in allowing these horrific acts to happen.
I don’t care how many drugs you have taken there is no excuse or reason for even contemplating, let alone carrying out what they did to those children.
These people are sick and need help. I believe in the idea of forgiveness, and the goodness in people.
It’s impossible to see any good in this situation except for fact that they were caught and therefore won’t abuse those children anymore.
It’s hard to forgive them for this.
Whether you knew him personally or just reading about this for the first time. How can you forgive someone for these crimes against the very innocent?
My thoughts also keep going to his family and bandmates. The future for all of them will be forever tarred with the memory of this betrayal.
The fans will move on, taking down their posters, throwing out their LP albums and looking for the next rock saviour to admire.
For his family and band it will be with them forever.
My heart goes out to them all and their families. Lest we forget all those people come from a tight knit, proud and loving place.
For them the shame will be something they will have to live with until they die.
I however refuse to forget the great people, the great times and experiences I had with Lostprophets.
The way they and their families welcomed me into their lives to help facilitate their dreams of becoming rock stars.
Something they achieved where so many others had failed.
Its something that can never be taken away from them. True the band is done, finished.
Life goes on though. Everyone involved in Ian will move on, but today with a very heavy heart.
I will never forget these events until the day I die. Its been an emotional day for me.
Who would have ever thought it would have ended up like this!!!!!! F**K!!!!”


And this is probably where I stand with it; I feel sad and angry.
I have a great deal of sympathy for the remainder of the band who have been robbed of their livelihoods and any future earnings by a man who some where along the way turned into a twisted, vile and repulsive excuse for human life.
I didn't like the band in the end but for a moment our lives crossed and the rest of the band and those associated with it are people like you and I. Real people with lives and feelings that are now intractably linked to the actions of this cunt of a man.
I don't need to add colourful hyperbole to let you know what I think of him - if you have read the extended case notes, Christ even if you have just read the bare minimum and aren't physically repulsed by the actions of the man and these two women then I suggest you have a word with yourself.
But the stain will never go away and if there is one thing in this day and age that people should be mindful of, particularly those in bands and in the public light, that this isn't the seventies, there is a global media spotlight on you.
You should probably think about your actions.

A few years ago I went to see a well known band play in the Lemongrove in Exeter. It was a great show, I had my CDs with me to get signed. After the show I waited with everyone else on the barrier hoping to catch the band after their set.
As the room was clearing, a security guard for the band came along and selected people to meet them. His job it seemed was to fuck off anyone who didn't resemble the Corpse Bride's slutty daughter.
Was I annoyed by this? A little, I will be honest, but I was not alone there were plenty of other dudes or older women there too and all of us not looking jailbaity were dismissed. When it was clear that one of the girls not selected had friends who were backstage one of the band came out and collected her, ignoring the rest of us patiently waiting.
After another five minutes stood there I left feeling more than a little uneasy about the whole thing.
I get it, you tour the world, you have shit conditions for transport, accommodation, food, sometimes venues, you are tired and human etc, the last thing you want when you come off stage is a dude who is probably going to tell you he preferred your older stuff, but the perception I left with that night was not a good one.
I'm not suggesting that anything happened, but if a story had hit the papers in the weeks afterwards it wouldn't have surprised me in the slightest and truthfully knowing the band members age (public eye boys, public eye) it made my fucking skin crawl.

The there is the band Blood On The Dance Floor.



Now I can't really comment musically about a band on a metal blog who are basically not metal without having more than a (usually) swing of bias and not only do they sound like 100% Cancerous Ear Aids, but a band who primarily seem to play to an audience of little girls should not (in my opinion) be churning out lyrics like:
Got a montser in my pants,
And if I ever get the chance,
Gonna cram it down your throat,
Watch you gasp for air and choke.
I'm gonna jizz all in you're face!
I'm gonna wreck this fuckin' place!

Now that may come across as prudish but we seriously have a problem these days with letting kids be kids. Everyone has a smartphone, a social media account and are open to abuse.

Wikipedia (which I appreciate isn't always the most reliable source) has a summation of BOTDF's singers alleged misdeamours:
Dahvie Vanity, the founding member of Blood on the Dance Floor, is widely accused of child molestation. His first publicly known offense arose in 2009 where Vanity was convicted for having sex with a minor and went on trial for it within the year 2010. In 2011, a petition to ban Blood on the Dance Floor from playing Warped Tour 2011 started before that summer began because of parents' concerns with Vanity's repeated reputation of sexual abuse to children. A Tumblr page located at http://truthaboutdahvie.tumblr.com/ includes "dozens of submissions from self-described ex-fans of the duo, support acts and crew members has been published, all of which recall past experiences with BOTDF member Dahvie Vanity and many of which relate to under-age sexual activity or some other form of sexual harassment from the ‘musician’."
In 2010, pop music artist Jeffree Star raged on social networking site Twitter about his experience with being around Dahvie Vanity, he made tweets such as:
"I no longer support Blood on the Dance Floor and how disgusting Dahvie is. Touching children and enjoying the attention is evil. Fuck off sicko. If you support that piece of shit then unfollow me because you're supporting child molestation. Dahvie is the lowest worthless scum I've ever met.
Being on tour with that child fucker has made me see the truth. I regret ever doing a song with that pig. RIP because you'll never be me. I'm gonna speak the truth 'til I die, we saw Dahvie bring under-age girls to his hotel rooms and do sexual things. 100% ILLEGAL."

Now I have read that Tumblar page until I couldn't actually take anymore and the attitude of this particular oxygen thief?
You can talk your shit you’re only makin' me famous - Bitches Get Stitches

I'm probably straying way off music here and into social commentary, which I try to avoid as when it's on the internet nobody reads it properly, doesn't properly form an argument in response and all of a sudden we're sharing videos about Joseph Kony thinking we're saving Africa.

My point, if I have one, is probably fourfold:

Firstly there is no denying that Ian Watkins is a very sick man who has committed and planned to commit some horrific acts and will hopefully never see the light of day again.

Secondly Ian Watkins and the women involved are responsible, not Lee Gaze, Mike Lewis, Jamie Oliver or any of the other former members. Yes, they made some shitty music and looked like they spent more time on their hair than practising their instruments but they are not guilty.
Neither is H from Steps for that matter you pricks.

Thirdly the rock scene is not a community.
It is not the community we are lead to believe it is.
Bands should protect themselves from being put in the position where they are accused. Bands should have a responsibility to their fan base not to take advantage and abuse them. Fans should have some respect. Your self esteem won't improve by fucking the singer - especially if he pisses on you afterwards and calls you a slut. Parents/friends, I know rock and roll is about rebellion but maybe you ought to preserve childhood a bit, look after yourselves/your kids a bit more.
Don't place yourself in that position.

And finally and most importantly there are two more victims of abuse in the world.
It could be argued this could have been prevented, but it wasn't. It's too late for that.
What remains now is to hope that they remain unscarred by the knowledge of this saga - physically and mentally - so it is paramount for their sake that they are protected and stupid shit like people publishing the names of their scumbag mothers to the world WILL ONLY DO THEM MORE DAMAGE YOU HEAR PEACHES GELDOF, YOU STUPID BITCH?
One hopes that the comedown off Crystal Meth and into the terrible shame of what they have been part of haunts them for the rest of their miserable lives.

It's a saddening, shameful and disgusting saga that should stand as a reminder to all that the fame game is a dangerous one and Watkins who once won hearts and minds for being clean cut ended up boxed on Cocaine and Crystal Meth chasing darker and darker sexual highs and abusing his position as a superstar.
Don't believe the hype kids.

Thursday 21 November 2013

2013: The year that wasn't.

So nothing has happened this year right?
I mean it's been nearly 12 months free of vitriol and snarky comments about something I profess to love so what has happened?
Well in no particular order of importance:

Lamb of God's Randy Blythe kicked off the year with the threat of 10 years in a Czech prison hanging over his head.



Slayer maestro Jeff Hanneman succumbed to liver failure and died possibly exacerbated by the lay off whilst he recovered from the flesh eating disease contracted by a spider bite two years ago.



More generally shit rhythm section news and former Iron Maiden drummer Clive Burr passed away this year.
Burr who played on the first three albums by the band had long been suffering from MS and died peacefully in sleep.
A sad time indeed and his former band who had supported him since his illness over whelmed him with a trust and several benefit gigs were understandably quick to issue their sadness at his passing.
Burr whose hard hitting and energetic style is often referred to as Maiden's greatest drummer, despite Nicko McBrain being the superior stick man technically, for the feel and punky style that he brought to numbers such as Running Free, The Prisoner, Run To The Hills etc.
Having played those first three albums a lot at the time it is a reminder that the East End band would not have sounded the way they did without Clive's incredible contribution.
Tributes poured in from all over the Rock world as musicians and fans influenced by the man's drumming paid homage to a man who in spite of suffering a terrible illness still retained his love of music, humour and irreverence until the end.
R.I.P Clive - your contribution to Iron Maiden can never be forgotten.


Then Adam Duce was fired from Machine Head.
In a heartfelt statement from Robb Flynn on the band's website he explained why Adam had to go and it broke my heart to hear of how the two friends had drifted apart and how Duce had effectively been struggling in Machine Head for years.
To be honest it was no great shock to learn this - Flynn and Duce have made no secret of their relationship difficulties over the last decade and being a road band has clearly taken it's toll.
Much like Maiden's Steve Harris you do feel though with Flynn that you get on board or get off.
He is now the only original member left, although he has always been it's heart and soul.
A shame though for sure as Duce's baselines on I'm Your God Now remains one of my all time favourites. He was replaced by some dude called Jared MacEachern who was in a band called Sanctity (no idea either but they were signed to Roadrunner for five minutes) and got the nod for his ability to hit the vocal harmonies. The jury is out for me.

After a triumphant UK tour drummer Joey LaCaze of Eyehategod passed away from respiratory failure at 42.


Deftones bassist Chi Cheng finally slipped away after a painful (for the fans) few years where he had remained in a state of semi conscious coma.

Legendary Door keyboardist and band leader Ray Manzerick also passed away.

On a non musical front, Tony Soprano, the James Gandolfini died of a heart attack at just 51. In the words of the big man himself:
“It's good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that and I know. But lately, I'm getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over.”
Not a good year for the dead pool.

The as if things weren't looking sucky enough, Slayer Skinbeater Dave Lombardo was fired, asked to sit out, decided to sit out, future endeavoured, whatever, by Kerry King and the cardboard cut out currently standing in for Tom Araya. As it turns out when Lombardo returned to Slayer he was not brought back in as a partner but as a player who received 5% of profits. Having returned from the World Painted Blood, Big Four extended jaunts Dave felt his pocket was a bit light and asked where the money his 5% was coming from was… You know if he was getting 5%, then how much was 100%?
Turns out not to be a question to ask and Dave has headed for the unemployment line whilst former Slayer stand in Paul Bosteph rejoined the band.
All in all, with Kings seeming lack of compassion towards the hole vacated by Hanneman, it has been a massive year of PR black marks for the thrash titans.

On no less a sad note Lou Reed also passed away, cue an outpouring of ignorant shit from vitriolic metal heads still angry over Lulu.
Make no mistake, I'm still angry over Lulu, but it is what it is - Lou Reed was a legend years before he became a ballsack faced rambling old git - there is no need to rag on a man now he is dead. Metallica on the other hand are quite capable of ruining themselves as this years self indulgent, time wasting excuse not to make decent music surfaced in the form of 3D concert movie Through The Never; a nonsensical blend of surrealist movie script and overly produced live footage that the band paid for from their own pocket and is currently tanking in Imax cinemas all over the globe.

Then there is the sad affair of Stone Temple Pilots.
The band fired Welland for being an unpredictable junkie liability.
Welland then alleged that they couldn't fire him and sued them. They sued him for loss of earnings and round and round it went with each side sniping at each other and doing everything but making music.
Until bizarrely STP surfaced with an EP featuring one Chester Bennington of former Nu Metal behemoths and chart bothering soundtrack machine Linkin Park. Clearly bored of waiting to see how windmill armed 'rapper' Mike Shinoda can piss off their remaining fan base he decided to go and actually sing on a record by a rock band. The results aren't spectacular but they are better than the last STP album and every Linkin Park release since Meteroa.

Recently Download popped out the blocks and finally sold it's soul down the river by announcing headlining acts of Avenged Sevenfold, er, Linkin Park and Aerosmith, backed by the talents of Rob Zombie, Fall Out Boy and Alterbridge. As the usual butthurt comments came crashing in one shining light emerged - A massively misjudged comment on social media of 'Why not Dying Foetus?' gathered so much momentum in a slightly ironic way that the undoubtably bemused American Death metal band find themselves on the Download bill.

Potentially vile human filth Ian Watkins has a date set for his baby raping trial - the extended fallout of this has inevitably done for the career of Lost Prophets, who split this year.

And finally in one of the strangest episodes Tim Lambesis of Christian tagged metalcore giants As I Lay Dying was arrested for attempting to hire a hit man to kill his wife.
Yeah… Lambesis apparently turned his back on his invisible friend and took to the gym and began abusing steroids, lifting weights, having affairs and generally pissing her indoors off.
After having had enough of his increasingly douchebagish behaviour she filed for divorce, a settlement which would undoubtedly take a sizeable chunk of his livelihood and the former God Bothering Austrian Death Machine singer was caught giving money to an undercover officer and asking him to kill his wife.
Seriously.
The trial is pending.

So that's why I haven't written much this year.
When the entire genre seems to crumble or turn into a surreal day in TMZ world I felt it was better to step off for my own sanity and yours dear reader. If I was sick of writing it, then you must be sick of reading it.

So why am I back?
Because sometimes you can get weighed down with the shitty things that happen and ignore the good.
Good things happened this year and in what has been dark days it is worth reminding people of them:

First off Randy Blythe is a free man. Acquitted of manslaughter the singer who had taken the brave step to return to the Czech Republic and face trial to clear his name was vindicated when the jury returned a not guilty verdict meaning that Lamb of God were free to resume business. With nearly a years earnings lost and the band and personnel near bankrupted by the process to clear their singers name they have immediately hit the road for the continuation of the Resolution tour; reminding people that at the beginning of last year they did actually release an awesome album.
In several incredibly powerful and mature statements Blythe sky rocketed in respect in the metal community as he asked people to remember the fact a young man tragically lost his life.
Randy's writings can be found on his instagram account and portray a very different person to the one who gets knocked out on their Killadelphia DVD - I urge you check out some of it as it is inspiring and moving stuff.

Kirk Windstein left Down.
I appreciate how that sounds, but for me Down have been growing stale for a while now, the Purple EP was churned out by a band who admittedly they were lazy and with Phil Anselmo much more caught up in his solo work, his record label, his horror house etc all I see Down doing at the moment is holding up great bands like Crowbar, Eyehategod and Corrosion of Conformity.
CoC have of course continued with the pre-Pepper line up and that is one thing, not my favourite era of the band, but you have to sympathise with Mullin and Dean for not just sitting around waiting for their famous guitarist to grow tired of hanging around with his celebrity mates.
Eyehategod having gone through tragedy actually have a new album in the can and from the 3 songs I have heard it will be up there with their best, however with Corrections House (awesome side project involving Mike IX Williams and Scott Kelly of Neurosis) just having release their debut and Jimmy Bower involved in writing the new Down EP you just know it is going to be a while before that surfaces.
Which leaves Crowbar. Now Crowbar is Windstiein. No Kirk, no Crowbar and for me their last album Sever The Wicked Hand was one of the best releases of their career and much better than the last three Down releases.
The opportunity for more Southern Sludge is a very exciting prospect.

British extreme metal legends Carcass returned (okay they returned to the scene a while back) with a new album in the fine shape of Surgical Steel; a stunning precision blow to the skull, back with all their gore soaked glory.

Elsewhere my boy Tristan Shone of Author & Punisher fame released the bold Women & Children album and toured the UK. On the back of this he picked up the opportunity to go out and support none other than Philip H Anselmo as he took his solo project on the road in the states.


And any year you get to see Iron Maiden and Alice In Chains twice can't be bad right?

If you want to know where I have really been hiding then as always I suggest you head on over to The Sleeping Shaman where I have produced over four pages of positive reviews this year which would suggest in a moment of maturity I have figured if you have nothing good to say then don't say it at all.

That said I feel I'll be back before the year is out with a round up of what I thought rocked and what didn't so prepared to be offended.
Peace out.
Or something.

Friday 21 December 2012

the Good 2012



After a year of moaning about things I supposedly love to an indifferent internet, it is always good to end the year on a positive note and there have been some real highlights for me personally this year. I would like to think this has been reflected in my end of year review for The Sleeping Shaman and the fact that this year I actually completed a top ten of best albums (compared to last years 7).

This won't be a list that everyone will agree with having spoken to various folks about the things released this year, but hey, it's an opinions game as always and this is mine:

10. Testament 'Dark Roots Of The Earth'




One of the greatest triumphs in recent rock history has to be the recovery from the Germ Cell Seminova strain of cancer by Testament frontman Chuck Billy. In 2008 I should have seen them play the small tent at Download, but in my defence I was very, very drunk and it seemed like such a bad idea.
The Foundation of Damnation however was a great comeback album and in 2009 I got to see them open for Megadeth and Judas Priest and they were by far the best band that evening.
This year saw them solidify their rightful place among thrash heritage with the release of 'Dark Roots Of The Earth'. Backed by drum titan Gene Hoglan and once again accompanied by one of the biggest egos to pick up a guitar in Alex Skolnick as well as original members Eric Peterson and Greg Christian  - it equals FoD in terms of majesty and goes toe to toe with classics like The Legacy.
Testament have delivered in Dark Roots another example of why they have been criminally over looked in comparison to the much over hyped Big Four, like Exodus, they are still making albums that kill the old way.
The only thing that gives me pause is the unnecessary, but not entirely unpleasant cover of Iron Maiden's 'Powerslave'… which is slightly weird.
Debate rages on about whether blast beats have any place on Thrash album like this; Er, yeah, cos they sound fucking great. Check the album out on Spotify or something if you don't believe me.

9. Black Magician 'Nature Is The Devil's Church'



Anyone who doesn't miss Cathedral is a chump.
There I said it and I wish I had paid them far more attention than I did when they were going.
The debut release both on Shaman Recordings and for Black Magician 'Nature…' goes some way to filling that gap. There are times on this album where they hit the heights of the earliest Cathedral recordings with it's crawling slow doom and a decent, but not plagiaristic vocal rasp.
Don't think for one minute that the band is a direct replacement for Lee Doran's departed heroes, Back Magician are very much their own band as well as giving the nod to their influences. This is seventies influenced, Hammond Organ flavoured, folk tinged Doom music for people who like their music dark and twisted.
This isn't here for the sake of nepotism, granted it doesn't throw up any new surprises to the doom genre, but what 'Nature…' does is deliver a quality listening experience that is both refreshing and timeless in it's genre.
Check it out - it's great. Better yet check it out on blood red vinyl, it's a thing of beauty.

8. Arc Of Ascent 'A Higher Key'



Spacey, stoner, prog, doom rockers Arc of Ascent delivered the follow up to their 2010 album Circle of the Sun this year and it was a belter.
At the risk of blowing my own trumpet here (oo er misses) rather than rehash it here, check out my review for The Sleeping Shaman, which was also featured on Roadburn festival's website as album of the day.
The Higher Key

7. Author & Punisher 'Ursus Americanus'



I'm a big fan of Tristan Shone and his Author & Punisher project.
His ventures into music and performance art are truly exciting in a musical and visual sense.
Again I am copping out slightly here but in a bid to convince you all at the end of the year that I can be a serious writer, here once again, is my review for The Sleeping Shaman.
Ursus Americanus

6. Shadows Fall 'A Fire From The Sky'



This is an album I have come back and back to this year.
In all honesty I thought the Shads would be joining God Forbid and Ill Nino on the list of formerly good bands I will not be listening to new material of anymore. However with the release of AFTS in the middle of the year my spirits were buoyed by the fact the band seemed to remember who they were finally. Sure they have accessible, almost beautiful melodies on tracks like Nothing Remains where guitarist Matt shows that frankly he is a better vocalist on backing than a fair few of his contemporary's lead singers, but then they have the full on death attack of tracks like the title song.
This album was a joy to listen to from start to finish, Bay Area influenced thrash, flavoured with a touch of hardcore breakdowns, gruff and clean vocals without veering into the Emo/Screamo bollocks territory and a production value and artwork that make it an album to be bought rather than stolen.
To cap it off they were awesome in the small tent at Download - one of the highlights of the weekend. Welcome back Shadows Goddam Motherfucking Fall.

5. Therapy? 'A Brief Crack Of Light'



People who know me well would have probably expected this release to be a little higher.
In truth I love Therapy? I actually went into a length rant on a football forum recently because someone on there filed Northern Ireland's finest under 'Bands From The Past Who Used To Be Great'. I felt obliged to inform them that Therapy? have not only churned out an immersive number of albums since Troublegum in 1995, but they have also been critically acclaimed.
Numerous times.
Yes, I know… my life is full of wonder.
Anyway, following 2010's incredible Crooked Timber album and the previous high quality outings I was expecting this one to leap out of the stereo and grab me. It didn't.
Instead Therapy?  produced one of their more quirky, off kilter, harder to listen to records and I struggled with it until I saw them back in April and they played a couple of tracks live. Since then the album has clicked and some of it is a real eye opening joy.
It'll never be my favourite album, but it has run pretty close this year for the sheer unexpected pleasure that connecting with this album has produced.

4. Neurosis 'Honor In Decay'



Put simply, Neurosis are great and this album is yet more proof.
Don't Believe This Me?
Try this one.
Never easy listening this album was surprisingly accessible for one of theirs - less dense than Given To The Rising, more mellow than Through Silver In Blood, yet as complex and dark as you could hope for, it was a close run battle for third.

3. Deftones Koi No Yokan



Winning the competition for most irritating title of the year Koi No Yokan (Premonition of Love) is the second album not to feature original bassist Chi Cheng as he is still in a semi conscious status following a near fatal car crash. However the comeback album Diamonds Eyes saw long time friend Sergio Vega step in and help the band produce a body of work that, compared to the two previous below par albums, put the band back on a critical upswing.
If that album drew comparisons to their earlier works, then Koi No Yokan offers a direct comparison the seminal White Pony album. Incredibly atmospheric with riffs as heavy as concrete elephants, swirling ambient electrics, angular rhythms this album cements their return to firing on all cylinders.
That said I was skeptical the first time I heard it, but this album is definitely a grower with immediate stand out tracks like Leathers slowly being replaced by the far superior Gauze and Rosemary that keep adding layers of depth and dimension to the listening experience.
Simply put, this album is one of the best of the deftones career, yet alone year.

2. Lamb of God 'Resolution'



It seems strange to think back to the beginning of the year and Lamb of God were actually in the media for their music… anyway for those who have short memories before they became an advert for how corrupt a justice system in a former Soviet Block country can be, they actually released an album called Resolution.
At the turn of the year this was exactly the thing needed to knock Machine Head's Locust of top spot on my stereo and LoG delivered one of their finest albums since The Ashes Of The Wake. Seemingly more focused than Wrath, more diverse and forward thinking than Sacrament, this was a massive statement of arrival in the big time. Lamb of God made an album that cemented their place at the top of the food chain - the likes of Ghost Walking and Insurrection are anthems made for festival pits, King Me is a monster of a track that towers over previous epics and they open with a sludge/thrash one - two punch to the face.
It's a shame this has been forgotten in the saga of the year. It has now been confirmed that Randy will face trial in February of next year, I hope that this is a matter that can be concluded quickly so LoG can get back out on the road and tour this album as the set at Download was far to short to do Resolution any justice.

1. Vision Of Disorder 'The Cursed Remain Cursed



I have got to admit several came close this year. LoG, Deftones and Neurosis could have all been contenders for the top slot this year, but one album for me stood head and shoulders above the rest and that was The Cursed Remain Cursed.
Having spoken to a few people about it, a view was expressed that it was a '90's Hardcore album'… they are not wrong about that in a sense, it is.
However it is a very special one.
Not only is it a damn good album and a reminder to your Nu Metal's, Metalcore's and Emo's how good really heavy, melodic metal music can be at a time when everything seems so soulless, but it is also an incredible comeback from a band who never fulfilled their potential the first time around.
I have waxed lyrical elsewhere about this album, but no other piece of music has made me as joyous this year. The sheer face melting anger, the off kilter melodies.
Maybe it's because it reminds me of being 19 again. Maybe I have just had the kind of year which at times could make St Frances of Assisi kick babies and from the moment Loveless came on I was granted an outlet for all that frustration and aggression. Maybe I am just so glad that a band I once thought gone forever was back and not only making albums again but making some of the best material of their career.
They were always head and shoulders above anything released in the nineties and for me there is only one album with as many play counts on my iTunes this year.
It is this one.

So that's it.
Another year bites the dust.
Providing we all survive through today next year promises to be a bumper one again.
Early interests include a new Alice In Chains album, a preview track is already streaming online, Tool are reporting that material for a new album is 'half done' which means maybe, maybe next year, but more likely 2025.
Maiden are returning to Donington 25 years after headlining for their first time and will be playing the Maiden England set - this will be the musical highlight of my year.
And History Towers faves Earthtone9 will unleash the Pledgemusic funded new album.

But I can't go without commenting on the breaking news that Lost Prophets singer Ian Watkins has been arrested and charged on pedophilia.
In a rare moment of considered thought, the British justice revolves around the principle of 'innocent until proven guilty' and as such I shall abstain from passing comment on the case, but having met Watkins several times I thought he was a cunt before all this.

Right, if this is it folks I'll see you on the lake of fire, because if I am fucked for writing this, you are sure all damned for reading.
Catch ya in the New Year...



Thursday 20 December 2012

The Bad 2012



As I may have hinted over the course of the last year some of the things present in the metal genre have been less than stellar; some times I swear I listen to things just to have an informed opinion of why I dislike it, when in reality it would be a far better use of time and fair better for the blood pressure to not bother listening and let it go.
However, I feel if I didn't I would be stuck at a gig or at a party with someone who says to me 'let's go watch Bring Me The Horizon/Parkway Drive' and the next moment I have weighed in fifty quid and I am standing in a room wondering why I am being raped in the ear by a bunch of douchebags who spent more time on their hair than they did on crafting anything resembling a good song.
Yes people, I do it for you.
And as I can't pretend I am okay with it, I do it in a way that will never get me employed as a writer for any music magazine, so why should I stop now?

Without further ado the The Bad of 2012...

10. God Forbid/Ill Nino 'Equilibrium'/'Whateverthefuckitwascalled'


 

It has to be a bonus tie at number 10.
Why? Well simply from my perspective because both of these bands used to be so damn good that I loved them. A lot.
Ill Nino's Revolution Revolucion and One Nation Army were awesome examples of Latin flavoured Nu Metal that made a lot of other releases post Millennial look and sound shit and as I wrote the other month God Forbid's Gone Forever and Constitution Of Treason were blinding examples of some of the best the Metalcore genre had to offer. However both bands have stumbled on since these releases becoming increasingly irrelevant - first trying to chase the big bucks and then reverting to their roots to try and keep the fans they had.
This year they both released records that I had actually forgotten about until I checked the list of albums released.
Albums so nondescript, they may as well have not released anything.
I'm not kidding - Nonpoint isn't anywhere because they weren't quite good enough to make the top ten best of, Papa Roach weren't in the bad or the ugly list with Connection, because they were just themselves - these are in this top ten now because they are so lame and uninspiring I could have probably sat in silence for two hours and had more musical stimulation.
Both have released amazing albums before, but these are so bland and forgettable the best thing I can say about them is they didn't send me into a fit of rage like some of the others on this list.
Why? Why? Why?
So utterly pointless it is the equivalent of a hermit trying to spice up his sex life with a danger wank.
I'd say avoid, but even if you didn't you probably wouldn't remember bothering.

9. Spineshank 'Anger. Denial. Acceptance.'





Sadly unlike the above two, I remember this one. Much in the same vein Spineshank released the incredible 'Height Of Callousness' and the slightly more accessible and Grammy winning 'Self Destructive Pattern'. Both these albums I still play to this day. Johnny Santos has a great voice despite looking like a Goblin from Lord of the Rings and the band created some bruising but effective music to accompany it. Raised by Dino Cazares in a test tube and released on the world as a baby Fear Factory they evolved into a decent band until years of being stuck on a bus with each other took it's toll and they split.
Like every other fucker in recent years they decided to reform and this year added a new album to their back catalogue.
And it is, unlike Ill Nino's Enigma or Dead World or 45 minutes of my life wasted or what have you, very memorable.
Memorable for the fact that Spineshank were a well honed machine. A precision cut tool. Now they are just a poor shadow of themselves. From the lack of Roadrunner funded production, to the ring rust of all the performers, to the clumsy attempts to replicate themselves Anger. Denial. Acceptance. is almost an appropriate chart of my reactions - No they are not that shit now! Oh my God I can't believe they have ruined their own legacy. Okay, this is shit, I'll listen to their old stuff and ignore this album.

8. Speaking of Fear Factory. 'The Industrialist'





What the fuck is going on with the once great industrial pioneers?
Having kissed and made up with Dino. Burton and the Fat Mexican booted out Christian Olde Wolbers and Raymond 'the human drum machine' Harrera for Strapping Young Lads thunderbroom and tub thumping merchants for the release of 'Mechanise'. Those who cared (bar me it seems) thought this was a great comeback album despite not buying it and it set the scene for this years next instalment of the continuation of Man vs Machine concept albums released by a band who have absolutely, in no way shape or form painted themselves into a thematic corner.
This years take on a story that was old before they made Terminator 3, was, well more of the same. Only no one outside of Burton and Dino seem to know who is in Fear Factory anymore but it's not Gene Hoglan as he's gone to play for Testament.
Picture the scene, spooky mechanical samples, digital sounding drums, thrashing riffs, a guttural roar, a rushed sounding clean chorus.
Yep sure as the Terminator keeps coming back, a paler copy of itself, so do Fear Factory, carrying on for the sake of carrying on, no new ideas, no skilled execution, no friggin imagination.
This release is as cold and dead as the heart of the machine.

7. Adrenaline Mob 'Omerta'




Who? Yeah I know...
Remember Mike Portnoy? Skin beater and founding member member of Dream Theater who decided he wanted to put his band of 25 years on hold so he could join Avenged Sevenfold? Only AX7 didn't want him to join and Dream Theater decided they wanted to carry on, preferably without the asshole who essentially tried to write off their day jobs?
Well if you aren't familiar with that tail of hubris you spend less time reading about Metal than I do.
Which is probably a forgone conclusion at this stage.
So anyway, old Portnoy needs a new gig and hey preseto, Disturbed go on hiatus.
The guitarist from Disturbed comes out and states they are taking a break from the band and he is going to get his rocks off doing Adrenaline Mob.
Who sound like a watered down, middle of the road Disturbed, only with a slightly more famous drummer.
Yes that's right a more average Disturbed.
In fact, that's harsh. Adrenaline Mob's debut made me long for 'Paint My Bottom Blue And Call Me Shirley, Woo, I'm Fucking Nuts, Me' Mad Davy Draiman from Disturbed.
That bad.
I'm sure there is a crack in the ass of America that needs to be filled by sub Nickelback, sub Disturbed rock - the kind of place where Godsmack and Creed are hailed as musical nirvana, but really? Dream Theater must be pissing themselves laughing from behind their pointy prog rock guitars.

6. Lacuna Coil 'Dark Adrenaline'



I'll open this by saying that no matter what Christina Scabbia is still hands down a babe. A total babe.
But before I get too Wayne's World on you, the new Lacuna Coil album is awful.
I felt (not unjustly) that the previous effort Shallow Life crossed the proverbial Rubicon into terrible, jangly, pop metal and now here on their latest release they promised they would get 'darker and heavier' again. The resultant mess is that the band flops around like a proverbial ragdoll caught between trying to regain some credibility with their old fans and keeping one eye on the commercial aspect of their career trajectories.
Sure it's heavier, but Andrea Ferro's male vocals sound watered down, Scabbia sounds like she is trying to emulate Sharon whatserface from Within Temptation and it sounds forced.
It's like the band went to America on the back of Comalies and got caught up with all the hype surrounding Evanescence and decided that despite existing for longer, being one of the biggest selling artists on Century Media (at the time), being better and more credible, they had to dumb themselves down to appeal to the American market.
I listened to this entire album with a pained expression on my face. And it's 18 fucking songs long… 18 songs!?! Who the hell needs to release an album that long? What's worse is one of the songs is a cover of R.E.M's 'Losing My Religion' a song synonymous with the band that wrote it. So why cover it? It was bad enough when they covered Depeche Mode's 'Enjoy The Silence', but thankfully that one was shorter.
Candlelight reportedly tried to sue illegal downloaders of this album earlier this year, well fuck that, they should have sued Candlelight for allowing this to come out.

5. Soundgarden 'King Animal'



I went into this the other week so I won't hammer the point home again.
I think people so desperately want quality bands that personally I believe it is a case of mass hysteria in some cases. So here is a story about mass hysteria instead:
A penis panic is a mass hysteria event or panic in which male members of a population suddenly experience the belief that their genitals are getting smaller or disappearing entirely. Penis panics have occurred around the world, most notably in Africa and Asia. Local beliefs in many instances assert that such physical changes are often fatal. In cases where the fear of the penis being retracted is secondary to other conditions, psychological diagnosis and treatments are under development. It is becoming increasingly clear that these forms of mass hysteria are more common than previously thought. Injuries have occurred when stricken men have resorted to apparatus such as needles, hooks, fishing line, and shoe strings, to prevent the disappearance of their penises. An epidemic struck Singapore in 1967, resulting in thousands of reported cases. Government and medical officials alleviated the outbreak only by a massive campaign to reassure men of the anatomical impossibility of retraction together with a media blackout on the spread of the condition.

4. Serj Tankian 'Harakiri'



System of a Down always had the ability to divide people's opinion.
Myself, I didn't like the first album when it came out. It wasn't until years later I went back and listened to it and it grew on me. I still don't dust it off that often now. However for one glorious moment the stars aligned for SOAD and Toxicity was fucking huge. Admittedly there was a large portion of Post 9/11 confusion in there and coincidentally timed lyrics. Plus the racist element of America immediately seized on the beards and skin colour and the slightly Anti-American stance and said 'terrorist'. Then there's the fact that Serj sounded like a goat despite being one of the finest vocalists around at the time.
After that there was the stop gap third album, the slightly contrived double album, the tales of drugs, internal fighting and the hiatus, Scars On Broadway and Serj's solo career and the 'will they? won't they?' reunion.
Why am I bringing this up now?
Because it's interesting. Unlike Serj's solo career.
System were always more than the sum of their parts - Darren Malarkian complemented Serj well before he got his John Lennon complex and their vocal interplay was great. The guys backing them were superb musicians.
Alone Serj is just uninteresting… he always seemed to balance out the crazy Malarkian moments, the ying to the crazy yang, the soaring voice next to the insane chatter, here apart from 30 seconds which sounds like Chop Suey I hated it for it's stark reminder of what the world is actually missing.

3. Hellyeah 'Band Of Brothers'



I'm not sure how I can adequately express my feelings about Hellyeah.
I loved Pantera, I like(d) Mudvayne (although their last few releases have been iffy to say the least and Nothingface were pretty damn good too and no one can deny that it is good to have Big Vin back behind a drum kit. Frankly the guy was probably rich enough to never have to do it after the sadly missed Pantera and the not at all bad Damageplan; the guy was probably entitled to never step on stage again after the horrific events of 2004, not to mention extremely lucky to be alive.
Hellyeah was born somehow and the first album is good, the second one less so and the latest one…
I think the best word I can describe it as is charmless. Utterly charmless. The music is lumpen and the lyrics hamfisted. It is a wonder how much milage they can get out of they 'Oooo we're Cowboy Rock n Roll Outlaws' vibe.
Especially when 3/4 of them aren't Cowboys from Texas, or even Hell(yeah).
I get the feeling the remaining band members are probably looking at each other and grinning because they are sharing a stage with one of their heroes. It's a rare thing a drummer evolves into a great song writer (Dave Grohl being the exception) and here just proves that. The first album was kinda fun, the second the material a little thinner and on this release it feels like a collection of noise for noise sake.

2. Steve Harris 'British Lion'





I was going to give this slot to Linkin Park's 'Living Things' but frankly they are not even remotely Metal anymore so the whole review would be a creative rehash of the following bile, Chester Bennington's Whiny voice, Mike 'Windmill Arms' Shinoda's wannaJay-Z impression, Go-Bots, universally bland shite.
So British Lion heroically steps into it's spot. Those of you familiar with me will know that Steve Harris is pretty much my musical hero. Having formed Iron Maiden on Xmas Day 1976, 'Arry Arris has ploughed the long road to global success by steering the Irons his way, and his way it has been - axing of countless band members including the original voice Paul Di'Anno, either you are with Harris or you are protected by Rod Smallwood because he knows you are the best pure Metal vocalist going.
And here's the rub with British Lion; apparently they were a band who Arry tried to take under his wing about a billion years ago, but like Dirty Deeds, Lauren 'Hot, but not musically talented' Harris, and a host of other bands he has been involved with, they aren't very good.
I spoke about Adrian's album on the Ugly list… that tried to be different, to push boundaries, step outside the box yadda, yadda, yadda. This, however is dated, bang average pub rock. Having been working on this since 1996 apparently (which was when Dickinson released the forward thinking Skunkworks album) this has taken Chinese Democracy levels of time to produce (admittedly Harris has been slightly busy in between) and the result is a resounding 'Meh'.
Unable to release under British Lion, this became a Steve Harris album and in truth it is a band collaboration, but there is little to suggest the muscular gallop of Iron Maiden in the soft rock conjured up by the band.
The crowning glory though is the singer. Harris' choice to replace Dickinson with Blaze Bayley was a poor one, his reluctance to face facts and get the Air Raid Siren back was a worse one. This guy… well, he is just awful.
Weak voiced, he just sounds strained all the way through on British Lion's awkwardly average fare.
Pains me to say it but if it hadn't had the words 'Steve Harris' on it, I would have never looked twice.

1. All That Remains 'A War You Cannot Win'



How the mighty have fallen.
I suppose it is comforting in this day and age to know that ATR have a seeming legion of loyal fans.
I am not one of them.
Let me make it clear I have only followed Phil Labonte since Shadows Fall, I have only purchased all their albums until this one, so when I get lectured online by people accusing me of being a 'fair weathered fan' my only response is one of complete mockery.
After This Darkened Heart and The Fall of Ideals, Overcome was a challenging album for all with it's desperate pop inflected tunes, it was also when the rise of Autotune started. For We Are Many was better, but no less tweaked.
This new piece of shit may as well have been put together by the lame pop rock loving cousin of the machine that is now putting together Fear Factory albums.
If any ATR fans find this review and are butt hurt about it and want to come whining and crying on the comments section about 'bands change and need to progress' then let me ask you this:
Is it progression to dumb down your sound to a level of complete predictability?
Is it progression to make your album in a studio rather than be able to reproduce it organically?
Do you like Nickelback?
Cos I fucking don't and that's what it sounds like now at times, and the fact they have scored a tour with Hinder is proof of this descent into the Seventh Circle of Middle Of The Road Mediocrity.
I appreciate it sucks when your favourite bands go South, but trust me better bands than All That Remains have been lost to this along the years.
And that fucking Autotune… there is so much of it all over the place I swear to God that when the solo kicks in on the first song the damn thing is even Autotuned.
This album is a turd, from the artwork, from the press build up, the pro-gun stance which looks even more obnoxious in the face of recent events, from the horrible mawkish lyrics to Stand Up, the dumbass video, the defiant stance against 'internet haters', to the saccharine sweet new material.
I could spend the rest of my days ranting about it, trolling you on your Facebook page, bitching about you on here, but at the end of the day you have made some fantastic music in your time, so I'll leave you with a reminder of that.
But I'll just point out that first week sales are down on the last album…

'I can't remember
The day that you told me
I won't be there, I'm not that strong
Holding these memories
I feel unfolding
This is the last time
Now I'm gone'

- All That Remains 'The Last Time'

Next up the Best of 2013.

Wednesday 19 December 2012

The Ugly 2012


Literally no one has ever asked me what an ugly album is.
Having done this for a couple of years now I have put up The Good, The Bad & The Ugly around this time detailing what I have thought rocked and what I thought did not, but I have also put up the third category as well.
Naturally when I first created the segment it was a catchy homage to Sergie Leone's superior movie about men awkwardly eyeballing each other, but it has come to represent a harder to pin down classification for some of the albums I have listened to this year.
Between writing for the Shaman and what I chose to listen to in my own time I have listened to tons of albums this year and for the first time I can actually make a solid ten in each of the categories so I felt it would be a good time to expand and explain myself.
What is an 'Ugly' album in the world of A Brief History of Metal?

An Ugly album is neither Good enough to make the top ten best releases or Bad enough to make the worst, but it worthy of being talked about for good or for bad. Make any sense?

Probably not… but without further ado

The Ugly 2012

10. Southern Badass 'Born In Mud'



Who?
What?
Yeah my thoughts too until the other week when I accepted the album for review. Southern Badass is like Ennio Morricone jamming with Down, Roadsaw and early Metallica. A one man outfit consisting of Arno Bechet and hailing from the humid swamps of… er France.
Essentially a tribute to all things NOLA and Stoner this album is raw and single minded.
And it kicks ass.
Sure it's not the greatest stoner/southern album and there is the same argument that saw Stone Temple Pilots called Stone Temple Plagiarists back in the midst of the grunge explosion, coming as they did from Detroit, but it is unashamed about its desire to plug in, turn it up, drink beer and rock out.
At times it is sublime, at times it is ridiculous. I love the ugly fucker.

9. Ministry 'Relapse'



So mere minutes after the never ending Ministry farewell circus rolled to a stop long enough enough for Uncle Al to finally put out the Buck Satan album he promised back when he was high as a motherfucker, he reformed the band - not a permanent reunion apparently, but a 'Relapse'.
Anyway the album itself is as full on as the George Bush trilogy of Houses of the Mole, Rio Grande Blood and The Last Sucker. Furious full on industrial thrash metal that actually stands as some of the band's heaviest and fastet material.
It was (un)surprisingly good, but whilst Al seems to have focused himself and it is a far cry from the heady smacked up days of Filth Pig, Dark Side Of The Spoon and Animosithwhatever, I still find myself more in love with the Paul Barker era as the man's greasy bass sound dragged Ministry back to the darkness that they thrived on - All the hyper focus on American politics leaves me a little cold.
That said if I had a top twenty this would probably be in it.

8. Kylesa 'From The Vaults: Vol 1'



I don't usually include best of or live albums in these lists (or Iron Maiden's En Vivo! would be seriously bothering the upper reaches of the Good list) but Kylesa's From The Vaults collection throws up unreleased, reworked and rare tracks, not to mention a couple of covers in order to provide enough material for those licking their lips at the thought of a new release.
Anyway as a shameless plug I reviewed it for the Sleeping Shaman so I will point you in the direction of my full thoughts should you want to know in depth what I thought of it.
My Two Cents.

7. Down 'IV - The Purple EP'



To be fair anyone who read my last entry would probably have been expecting Down to end up in a different category... Hell, I did.
I thought mid-way through the year that Down had come to save the end of my year of contrived dreariness by giving me another slab of Stoner/Hardcore/Doom,  but sadly that hasn't proved the case. There isn't anything wrong with 'The Purple EP' let me be clear on that... Witchtripper, Open Coffins are great slices of Sludge, but to me it's just bang average from a band who have the quality to turn in greatness.
I get the concept of releasing EPs, Christ I am still waiting for Tool to follow up 2006's 10,000 Days which was for me literally a lifetime ago, so I am all for shorter listening, more regular releases, major touring, but when I am asked to pay nearly album price for six tracks that it sounds like they knocked out in their sleep then I'm a little disappointed. Sure those six tracks are better than a lot of bands manage on full cylinders, but it just feels lacking.

6. Primal Rock Rebellion 'Awoken Broken'



Earlier this year the Iron Maiden website was alight with rumours about an exciting new project featuring Adrian 'H' Smith Axe God, Heroic Goatee Grower and One Third of Maiden's 'Three Amigos' (well more than one third of the ability...). This project was to feature Mikey Whatisface from On/Off British Technical Metal/Screamo/Math/Whateverpigeonholeyouwanttojamtheminthisweek outfit Sikth.
Well it turns out H is down with the kids. Always one of the more contemporary thinking of the Maiden crew, he put together a project featuring people who probably weren't even sperm when he wrote his first classic, as clearly despite reaching number one in 26 countries (yes, 26 read it and weep) with The Final Frontier, there was an itch that needed to be scratched.
Now, confession time. I have championed a lot of British metal in my time but I have never got well with Sikth. I cant fucking stand them, they sound like a mess and I really dislike both vocalists sound. Mikey is actually a really nice guy though and I wanted to like it to give me a new perspective on his sometimes day job, but sadly it was only passable - there were some great guitar parts (and some very average ones) but I struggled to get past the vocals and I know a lot of other Iron Maiden forum members did too. Admittedly it's not the worst thing to come out of the Maiden camp this year (more on that later), but it very much flatters to deceive.
And the fucking name is awful.

5. Emmure 'Slave To The Game'



I have talked about my love for Emmure's 'Speaker Of The Dead' before and it was sadly little surprise that this years follow up 'Slave To The Game' was a pale copy of the 2010 album. It was simply another round of sledgehammer hip hop influenced deathcore. Musically it treads the same path as before, pug ulgy, punch drunk, breakdown heavy, low brow, brutality.
It's perfectly listenable, it's not bad, but it is simply a case of the songs not being as memorable or simply as good as the ones that preceded it. I'm not massively disappointed, I'm not even sure I expected them to be anything more than a passing fad for me and 'Slave To The Game' merely confirms this.

4. Sylosis 'Monolith'



So one of the touted future leading lights of British metal, Reading's Sylosis have been gathering momentum over the last couple of years and despite suffering the loss of original vocalist Jamie Graham after their first album, they have gone from strength to strength both critically and commercially since guitarist Josh Middleton stepped up to the mic.
This years 'Monolith' continued the trend with a barrage of technical metal and intricate melodies. It's good. Honestly.
It's just... it doesn't really excite.
It's brutal, it's well executed, but I don't really care about it. I wish I could, I want to, but...
I loved their first album and went to see them live just after Josh had become vocalist and they were just loud. On stage nothing really happened and the new material seemed to pass me by. Maybe it was the sound in the place, but after a few numbers we went to the bar and didn't hurry back.
This album is the same, it sounds like a ton of bricks, falling in a calculated manner, the vocals are raw, everything is in it's place and yet somehow it feels like something is missing.

3. While She Sleeps 'This Is The Six'



From one great white hope of British Metal to another. Northern band While She Sleeps looked to capitalise on the good will generated on the back of their 'The North Stands For Nothing' debut with the pummeling follow up 'This Is The Six'.
Much like the previous release, the full length set is an uncompromising barrage of heavy.
The lyrics are delivered in a a throat scrapingly raw style, broken with gang vocal style chants which is at least more original in this day and age than the now standard gruff/clean combo. It is a very well constructed album that rocks along at an absolutely ferocious pace.
I have to tip my hat to them, they are developing into a great band and were by far my favourite when I saw them on the Metal Hammer tour with Sylosis and, well whoever else it was... but I have to curb my enthusiasm and say that it is possibly a little raw for my tastes.
It lacks a certain deftness, it's hard to explain because I have appreciated it every time I have listened to it.
I just can't love it.

2. As I Lay Dying 'Awakened'



I talked earlier this year about how I love AILD and had my reservations about this years 'Awakened' due to the contrasting vocal styles, which is exactly why this very nearly took top slot for me.
Make no mistake this is an incredibly heavy album.
At times this is almost back to the monstrously heavy death metal stylings of their debut album and it is incredibly brutal.
Lambesis' vocals are a savage guttural roar from start to finish and the song writing is almost back to their Shadows Are Security best, but then that clean vocal kicks in.
If anything I find the clean vocal harder to accept than anything else.
The breakdowns could level city blocks, the speed riffs melt your face off, but when nearly every song drops into a big girly chorus it just flat out jars.
The irony here is that by trying to produce something with accessible melodies, they have made an ugly mess of what could have been a great album.

1. Meshuggah 'Koloss'



Jeez, what to say about Meshuggah?
They invented their own genre (mathcore, djent, whatever).
They are unrelentingly heavily.
They are uncompromising.
They released a new album this year.
Meshuggah are kind of like Neurosis in the way that they have gone off into their own bubble that frankly doesn't really care what you think.
A few years ago they released a 21 minute track and called it I.
Koloss in the latest piece of technical brilliance from the Swedish masters of metal so complex they can write maths theories on the time signatures, metal so fucking heavy they downtuned 8 string guitars.
A snarling, hulking tornado of an album...
I admire them a great deal, I have more albums of theirs than I'll probably ever need though and the latest one is simply an addition to that collection. I can't put on one of their albums to relax, I can't get friends round and chuck on the new one in company.
It's like an endurance test, headphones on and be awed by the dizzing heights of creativity they reach.
Music to play in the car when I am in an open minded bad mood.
Some times I need to hear Meshuggah... sometimes I couldn't think of anything worse to listen to.
I'll never put it on without psyching myself up first.
It's fucking brilliant. In small doses.

The next instalment… The Bad.